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Wednesday, June 30th, 2010

    Time Event
    12:26a
    Gates, or I go to the raucous bar of my choiceI’m...
    Gates, or I go to the raucous bar of my choiceI’m now a confidential legal consultantHow do you
    want to pay it? I can’t imagine you have it with you, so how will you honor the debt—for the
    information?”
    “My word—”
    “Forget it, RandyI’ll have it sent to the Boston Five in the morning
    “That’s very endearing of youBut in case it occurs to your superiors to stop me from collecting,
    please advise them that an unknown person, an old friend of mine in the streets, has a letter
    Robert Ludlum ?? THE BOURNE ULTIMATUM
    50
    detailing everything that’s gone on between usIt is to be mailed to the Massachusetts Attorney
    General, Return Receipt Requested, in the event I have an accidentThe information, please
    “Yes, well, you should know that you’ve involved yourself in what appears to be an extremely
    sensitive government operation, that’s the bottom lineOn the assumption that anyone in an
    emergency leaving one place for another would do so with the fastest transportation possible, our
    rumbottom buy miu miu detective went to Logan Airport, under what guise I don’t knowNevertheless, he
    succeeded in obtaining the manifests of every plane leaving Boston yesterday morning from the
    first flight at six-thirty to ten o’clockAs you recall, that corresponds with the parameters of your
    statement to me—‘leaving first thing in the morning ”
    “And?”
    “Patience, RandolphYou told me not to write anything down, so I must take this step by step
    Where was I?”
    “The manifestsWell, according to Detective Sleaze, there were eleven unaccompanied children
    booked on various flights, and eight women, two of them nuns, who had reservations with minors
    Of these eight, including the nuns who were taking nine orphans to California, the remaining six
    were identified as follows The old man reached into his pocket and shakily took out a typewritten
    sheet of paper“Obviously, I did not write thisI don’t own a typewriter because I can’t type; it
    comes from Führer Sleaze
    “Let me have it!” ordered Gates, rushing forward, his hand chanel jumbo outstretched
    “Surely,” said the seventy-year-old disbarred attorney, giving the page to his former student“It
    won’t do you much good, however,” he added“Our Sleaze checked them out, more to inflate his
    hours than for anything elseNot only are they all squeaky clean, but he performed that
    unnecessary service after the real information was uncovered
    “What?” asked Gates, his attention diverted from the page“What information?”
    “Information that neither Sleaze nor I would write down anywhereThe first hint of it came
    from the morning setup clerk for Pan American AirlinesHe mentioned to our lowbrow detective
    that among his problems yesterday was a hotshot politician, or someone equally offensive, who
    needed diapers several minutes after our clerk went on duty at five-forty-fiveDid you know that
    diapers come in sizes and are locked away in an airline’s contingency supplies?”
    “What are you trying to tell me?”
    “All the stores in the airport were closedThey open at seven o’clock
    “So?”
    “So fake birkin someone in a hurry forgot somethingA lone woman with a five-year-old child and an
    infant were leaving Boston on a private jet taking off on the runway nearest the Pan Am shuttle
    countersThe clerk responded to the request and was personally thanked by the motherYou see,
    he’s a young father and understood about diaper sizesHe brought three different packages—”
    “For God’s sake, will you get to the point, Judge?”
    “Judge?” The gray-faced old man’s eyes widenedExcept for my friends in
    various gin mills, I haven’t been called that in yearsIt must be the aura I exude
    “It was a throwback to that same boring circumlocution you used both on the bench and in the
    classroom!”
    “Impatience was always your weak suitI ascribed it to your annoyance with other people’s
    points of view that interfered with your conclusionsRegardless, our Major Sleaze knew a rotten
    apple when the worm emerged and spat in his face, so he hied himself off to Logan’s control tower,
    Robert Ludlum ?? THE BOURNE ULTIMATUM
    51
    where lady dior bag he found a bribable off duty traffic controller who checked yesterday morning’s schedules
    The jet in question had a computer readout of Four Zero, which to our Captain Sleaze’s
    astonishment he was told meant it was government-cleared and maximum-classifiedNo manifest,
    no names of anyone on board, only a routing to evade commercial aircraft and a destination
    “Which was?”
    “Blackburne, Montserrat
    “What the hell is that?”
    “The Blackburne Airport on the Caribbean island of Montserrat
    “That’s where they went? That’s it?”
    “Not necessarilyAccording to Corporal Sleaze, who I must say does his follow-ups, there are
    small flight connections to a dozen or so minor offshore islands
    “That’s it?”
    “That’s it, ProfessorAnd considering the fact that the aircraft in question had a Four Zero
    government classification, which, incidentally, in my letter to the attorney general I so specified, I
    think I’ve earned my ten thousand dollars
    “You drunken scum—”
    “Again you’re wrong, Randy,” interrupted the costume chanel jewelry ju

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